Things I could have bought instead of school uniform

Happy and the School Bear This Thursday, Flea will join the reception class at her school. Being an organised, professional sort of Mummy, obviously I chose today (Tuesday) to go and buy her school uniform.

Fortunately, Flea attended the pre-school already, so she can re-use some kit from last year, but she needed some new kit, namely:

  • One blazer
  • Two pinafores (she has two but I need five since I can't deal with the pressure of mid-week laundry)
  • Five jumpers (see above)
  • Two ties (how dirty does a tie get? Actually, don't answer that)
  • One PE shirt
  • One pair of school shoes
  • One pair of white pumps
  • One book bag

I cannot believe how much these items cost. How have I been wasting my life scratching a living in journalism when the real lucre is to be made in manufacturing small items of clothing with fancy badges stitched on?

Because I like to torture myself, here are five things I could have bought with the cash I just handed over in the school uniform shop: 

  1. A full luxury day at The Sanctuary in London, complete with lunch, champagne and two beauty treatments.
  2. A return flight to Boston, complete with a lobster dinner at Legal Seafood.
  3. A Fortnum & Mason hamper, complete with foie gras and champagne. (I covet the baskets more than the food, to be truthful)
  4. A Paloma Picasso bracelet from Tiffany & Co to replace the one I lost during an ill-advised gardening venture.
  5. Everything on page 4-5 of the current Christmas ideas catalogue from Lakeland Limited. It's a true fact that the only thing in life better than a Lakeland Limited catalogue is a Lakeland Limited Christmas Ideas catalogue.

Oh, and I've told Flea that every time she gets a stain on her school uniform a fairy dies. That's not bad parenting, right?

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