This isn’t one of those moaning posts.
I love my job, I love my friends, I have the best kid in the world (imho), life is really very exciting, and optimistic and all sorts of good things at the moment.
I keep finding my mind drifting to open spaces. Wide skies. Cold, fresh air that catches at the back of your throat. I want to watch the morning sunlight rippling across open water, and to lie back and hear nothing but the wind in the trees and the birds in the sky. Peace!
I imagine running my fingers over rough bark, feeling leaves and pebbles under my feet. I want to stand at the edge of water and jump back before it soaks through my boots. I want to watch the steam rising out of a flask of hot chocolate, and sit in peace with my best friend, doing nothing more than watching the world go by and waiting for the moment the sun sinks into the water.
Life gets so hectic sometimes, doesn’t it?
From the moment I wake up, I’m connected to something. There’s email and Twitter and my mobile, and instant messaging, and Skype and phone calls, and the postman at the door, and a courier package to be collected.
There’s the school run, the traffic, the parking – I sometimes wonder how much time each week I devote to the (highly) imperfect art of parking.
This weekend, I visited my parents, and was thrilled that my Mum had found one of my old photo albums on the top shelf of a cupboard. There are dozens of photos – lots of thrilling fashion choices from the 1980s, but also stacks of my favourite photos, taken on various trips overseas.
I think the album got mislaid, during the divorce, when I was moving house. Having it back feels like being reunited with an old friend. I’ve taken some of these photos to the printers to have enlarged and hung over my desk. It’s not quite the same, though.
Sometimes the hardest thing in the world is finding the time to do nothing at all.