So I was chatting with a friend recently, who was in the middle of trying to organize a social get-together with the parents from her son’s class at school.
Turns out organising this kind of event is tricky – finding a day when people aren’t working, or don’t have other plans. My friend had suggested an evening get-together but the idea was shot down. Why?
Well, according to one of the school Mums, “all the single Mums will be there, all dressed up, you know…”
Newsflash, ladies. I don’t want to have sex with your husband. I’m a single, working Mum and by 10pm on a Friday night it’s about as much as I can do to crawl into the shower, much less crawl into bed with your fella.
Besides which, I’ve been married. And as it happens, it’s not an experience I’m in any rush to repeat. Imagine what co-habiting could mean for my mug cupboard system, for starters.
Despite this, it hasn’t passed me by that in four years of living in the small town where I live (where I think I might actually be the only single parent) I’ve only been invited to a handful of evening events. And half of them were at the church.
I have lots of friends, and they’re amazing and we have great play-dates with the kids, and Sunday lunches, and days out – but parties? That’s strictly couple territory.
I suspect this might change in about five years when some of the Marrieds in my town get divorced and my friends start trying to fix us all up with one another, like dysfunctional Stickle Bricks.
But it’s not like I’m hanging out for that. I’m not going into details on the Internet, for all our sakes, but I do okay in terms of what we might call “company”. I’m certainly not leaning out of the window with a telescope waiting to catch a glimpse of someone else’s man.
In the meantime, though, why are some women so scared of single Mums?
Are there really armies of single Mums out there with a hook and reel trying to snap up a new man? Or are we being unfair and losing out on friendships because of mistrust?