How to Make a Good Impression on the School Secretary

Flea Flea's been back at school now for two weeks.

Not long. But long enough for me to demonstrate exactly what sort of parent I am to the school's administrative staff.


Selected conversations I've had so far:


“Hello Miss Whittle, it’s Mrs W here, at the grammar school.”

“Ah, okay. Hi.”

“Just to let you know Flea has a bit of a bump on her head.”

“Does she?”

“Yes, she told us she actually did it last night, when you threw her at the bed.”

“Good grief. It sounds bad when you put it like that doesn’t it?”

“Yes, she says it hurts quite a bit, we just wondered if you wanted to come and collect her.”

“Sure, I’m on my way.”


“Hello Miss Whittle, it’s Mrs W here, from the grammar school.”


“We just wanted to let you know that Flea has had a bit of a tumble at school today.”

“Really? Is she okay?”

“We think so. She was showing someone karate exercises, and she ran into a door.”


“She’s very upset. Do you want to come and collect her?”

“Sure, I’m on my way.”


“Hello, Miss Whittle, it’s Julie here, at the grammar school.”

“Oh. Hi.”

“Just to let you know we’ve got Flea here. The school closed at 1pm today. Do you think you could come and collect her? She's just waiting outside the school office.”

“Sure, I’m on my way.”


Sally is a full-time blogger and founder of the Tots100, Trips100, Foodies100 and HIBS100 communities, along with the MAD Blog Awards. She spends a bit too much time on the Internet. She’s also a very happy Mum to Flea, the world’s coolest ten year old.

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  1. Nikki
    23rd September 2010 / 9:31 pm

    Crikey Moses Sally – not the best start PMSL! Two bumps and then you forgot her – sorry, I’m not laughing at all I promise.
    In the 3 weeks Jenni’s had at school so far, we’ve had three bumps notices back so far (two bandaged knees, a knocked cheek and a scrapped leg) – honestly, Jenni looks like she’s been in a war, covered in bruises. Hey ho, at least we have the slips proving we didn’t do it!!
    As for the early finish, not sure about you but there’s normally at least 2-3 letters/pictures plus books in her bag each day so that’s easily missed – it can only get better Sally :-))))

  2. 23rd September 2010 / 9:56 pm

    PMSL nice. Better luck next week.

  3. 24th September 2010 / 8:15 am

    ha ha that really made me laugh! loved the moving onto first name terms!

  4. 24th September 2010 / 9:00 am

    This is why we don’t go to school in our house – infinitely too much opportunity for people to spot the sort of mother I am 😀
    I did at least used to be able to quip “Oh well, I haven’t killed one yet…” – now, not so much *ironic laugh*

  5. 24th September 2010 / 9:45 am

    I now have the idea that you are training Flea, Kato-style…

    Presumably, head-injuries also explain the memory loss regarding school closure time.

  6. 24th September 2010 / 4:28 pm

    I’m trying not to do the same at DD’s new school! So far (touch wood) only call from school was because they couldn’t read some of the information I’d written on her registration form..

  7. 5th October 2010 / 2:48 pm

    I’ve lost count of the times I have the kids waiting bereft in the school reception when it’s closed early at the end of term. The last time it happened it took my daughter a whole 24 hrs before she would speak to me again. Great post!