This week our home has become the House of Lurgy.
I’ve been felled by a nasty throat infection that has meant, for large portions of the last 10 days, I haven’t been able to speak.
This has been quite a blow for me, as people who know me well will understand. We’re a fairly chatty family…
On Tuesday morning, I woke up completely unable to speak. So after shaking my daughter awake, in a loving way, I went downstairs and left her to get herself dressed.
When she eventually arrived in the dining room we were running late and Flea appeared to be unable to understand my (frankly) awe-inspiring sign language, supplemented by lots of MMmmm-MMM-hmmm noises.
So I resorted to typing what I wanted to say on the Windows Surface tablet.
Tonight I was looking for an email when I found the list of things I “said” to my beloved child between 8.25am and 8.40am on Tuesday morning.
It’s actually a little bit shocking to see the things I say to Flea in black and white. Turns out I’m a teeny, tiny bit grouchy in the mornings, especially when I’m less than fighting fit. Still, I’m sure this sort of parenting is building Flea’s character by the bucketload, right? Does everyone’s morning sound a bit like this? Please tell me it does…
Cereal or toast?
Try on the doorstep.
Pancakes take too long.
Why did it take you so long to get dressed?
40 minutes!!!
Should there be a button on that?
There’s another in the tumble drier.
You can do that in the car.
You can do that in the car.
You can do it in the car.
I’m not well enough and I don’t have time to explain.
Because it took you 40 minutes to get dressed!!
Not cross, just exasperated.
I love you too.
Is that last night’s dinner on your face?
SERIOUSLY??? Go and wash.
What form?
I haven’t seen it.
Can we stay home? I am too sick to drive.
Please????
OK then.
Can you at least clean that milk off the table before it stains?
Ready?
Where are your bloody shoes????
I give up.
No. We definitely have to go to school.
I love you too. Let’s go 🙂
Did you notice where I put my keys last night?
