I love reading those posts about “40 Things I have Learned Since Turning 40” and “10 Lessons I’ve Learned about Parenting” type posts, but friends, that post is never going to be written by me.
Simply put, I am at an age now where I have forgotten so many more things than I have learned that – frankly – it’s embarrassing.
Today’s memory lapse started last night, when I forgot to set the alarm and thus woke up in a panic at 8am.
As I hastily brushed my teeth, I heard the distant rumble of the council rubbish truck, and realised I’d forgotten to put the bins out again (six weeks and counting, I wonder if there’s a medal?).
Driving to school, I forgot Flea needed a cheque for her school trip, which was due last week. Of course, I’ve forgotten where my cheque book is, so even if I’d remembered, I think I was probably already onto a loser on that score.
I arrived at work having – praise Jesus – remembered to stop for coffee and a bagel en route – and set to work, where I promptly forgot to reply to a Facebook message from a friend who I suspect is having a tough time; entirely skipped a conference call; and had to reset my Skype password not once but twice, because I couldn’t remember it.
Work was interrupted by a call from school to tell me that my daughter was sitting in the head’s office because I had forgotten to pick her up – there was no late room today because of parent’s evening. I swear, that school is out to get me.
BONUS POINTS: I had also forgotten parents’ evening.
Child collected, teachers met, I thought my winning streak might be at an end, but oh no.
In the car on the way home, I was chatting with Flea about my day. It’s a good 15-minute drive home and we were passing the time happily, planning our evening out.
“Hey, why don’t I make dinner, and while I’m doing that, you can walk the…”
The dog was still at the dog sitters. Cue a 30-minute detour to go and get her, apologising madly to the sitter for being late, then we drove back home again.
Please, please tell me it’s not just me?