Monday, bloody Monday

Five things I've learned today:

  1. The universe has a twisted sense of humour. So, I posted last week about my paranoia that Flea would choke to death on a piece of apple skin. And this morning, Flea choked on a piece of apple skin. Fortunately, I was sitting next to her at the time and was able to do some back slaps and get it out, but good grief – we're so going back to peeling them tomorrow.
  2. There is something on earth more painful than standing on Lego in bare feet. It's called "standing on a Playmobil sword". Ouch.
  3. Never accept a first offer. So when the council rang and said I had four parking fines totalling almost £1,000, I completely panicked and said the first thing that popped into my head. Which was: "Oh bugger. Really? What's your best offer for cash?" Which was a joke, but turned out the council quite likes cash and I saved £700 in the process.
  4. The required size of an image in a blog sidebar is always 10 pixels LESS than the size you just painstakingly made the JPG.
  5. Going to the cinema and throwing popcorn at idiot 12 year olds who talk through the movie is SO much more fun when you're a couple in your 30s and therefore completely above suspicion. Also: what were a bunch of 12 year old boys DOING at a showing of The Proposal? Weirdos.


Sally is a full-time blogger and founder of the Tots100, Trips100, Foodies100 and HIBS100 communities, along with the MAD Blog Awards. She spends a bit too much time on the Internet. She’s also a very happy Mum to Flea, the world’s coolest ten year old.

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  1. diane
    3rd August 2009 / 2:13 pm

    3 made me laugh, but is a useful lesson! Thanks 🙂 (But 1k, really?! Where did you park?)
    Re number 5, be careful doing that! A woman told some kids to shut up last week and got bleach in her face, as you might have heard. That’s Yorkshire though. Maybe they’re nicer in Lancs. And maybe she should have just thrown popcorn.
    Was The Proposal as stoopid as I suspect? I love Sandy B but am not a Ryan Reynolds fan, so I’m torn…

  2. Sally
    3rd August 2009 / 2:18 pm

    It’s not so much where I parked – it’s when. They’re tickets from 2008. I thought I’d paid ’em, they just keep popping up out of the woodwork, so when they called today they were about £240 each. Eek. Still, it goes to show that it definitely pays to ask!
    Re #5 – seriously?? Jeez. They were just small enough that we could have taken them in a fight, though. Boyf is quite a broad-shouldered chap. Also, I can run faster than him, which after all, is what really counts.
    The Proposal – formulaic, nonsense and a bit weird in parts. I cried, obviously. But I quite fancy Ryan Reynolds. And I secretly want to live in Alaska, despite knowing this was actually filmed on Boston’s North Shore.

  3. 3rd August 2009 / 6:03 pm

    Loved No.3, done No.2, have thought about doing No.5 MANY times!

  4. Sally
    3rd August 2009 / 7:19 pm

    @Jo – do, it’s REALLY satisfying. Best if you’re with a tall strapping chap, though, just in case.

  5. 3rd August 2009 / 7:54 pm

    Sally, I’m seeing tall, strapping chap tomorrow, but we’re dancing. Will keep it in mind for next time. Thanks. x

  6. Sally
    3rd August 2009 / 10:40 pm

    @Jo – I only say it because of Diane’s story. My strapping chap was a happy coincidence, not pre-arranged protection.

  7. 4th August 2009 / 3:07 am

    £700/£1000 is quite a saving – well done!

  8. Sally
    4th August 2009 / 8:59 am

    It does just go to show what you can ask. He didn’t offer it all in one go, to be fair. He did the sucking the teeth thing and said, “I can reduce one back down to the ticket price, Miss” and I asked if he could possibly, please reduce them all because I didn’t mean to park in silly places, and I’m SO silly for losing the little slips that come in the post, and I’m a single parent, you know, and GOODNESS knows how I’ll pay the mortgage now and …. I think he agreed to shut me up, basically!

  9. 4th August 2009 / 1:02 pm

    A Playmobil Sword you say – yikes. Will pack all mine, and pirate guns, away immediately. And what’s this thing you refer to as a cinema? I vaguely remember something like this but then I also seem to remember it involves going out. So perhaps I dreamt it.

  10. Sally
    4th August 2009 / 3:10 pm

    @HotCrossMum – ha. I have to say, the cinema is my *last* remaining treat to myself. Because I’m a single Mum it’s not easy to go out in the evenings, so this last year or so I’ve started sneaking off to the cinema in the afternoon while Flea’s at nursery. You should try it – it’s such a good way to relax and take a mental holiday from things. Although of course I can only do this because i don’t have a *proper* job.

  11. 4th August 2009 / 3:36 pm

    We have a thing about sausages – they are all windpipe-shape and my son actually went blue once having inhaled one. I’ve also heard of someone relatively close to my family dying from choking on a sausage. We now cut them lengthways fo the kids.
    We give them unpeeled apples, though. 🙂