Oh, what a tangled web we weave

Flea I suppose I should be grateful it's taken this long.

But this last month or so, my daughter has discovered that – actually – you don't always have to tell the truth. So she's become a master of deceit, lies tumbling from her childish lips at an ever-increasing rate.

The problem, of course, is that she doesn't quite grasp the concept of 'plausibility' yet. So her lies? Well, they're not exactly subtle. Here are my favourites from this week:

While standing next to a broken ornament: "It just fell off when I was standing here not doing anything to it."

When I asked her what her hair bobbles were doing in the cereal: "I don’t know HOW the bobbles got into the Shredded Wheat, Mummy. Maybe those cheeky monkeys did it."

At 2am, playing with her dinosaurs: "I got out of bed to give you a snuggle, but it was dark and I couldn't find my way."

Not wanting to share her toys:  "I don’t know where the sword is. It’s not behind the sofa."

When I picked her up from after-school club: "No, we didn’t have sandwiches. Mrs Hardman said that they were only for the juniors. What's for dinner?"

[ps – this photo was Flea's response to a reasonable request to "smile for the camera". Kids, eh?]


Sally is a full-time blogger and founder of the Tots100, Trips100, Foodies100 and HIBS100 communities, along with the MAD Blog Awards. She spends a bit too much time on the Internet. She’s also a very happy Mum to Flea, the world’s coolest ten year old.

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  1. 3rd December 2009 / 2:01 pm

    She’s obviously just very creative. View it as a good sign!

  2. 3rd December 2009 / 3:46 pm

    My kids are very skilled at telling the truth, while not quite telling the truth. For example, in my equivalent of the broken ornament story, my son said “It broke when the football got onto it”.

  3. Vic
    3rd December 2009 / 3:59 pm

    You have to laught at some of the things they come up with!

  4. 3rd December 2009 / 8:20 pm

    I was wondering when L would discover the power of lying… she hasn’t got it yet (2 1/2). I asked her a couple of weeks ago why A was crying (not really expecting an answer, just making conversation, you know how it is) and was told “because I did bite her”.
    Oh. Do you punish the bite or praise the honesty?!

  5. Sally
    4th December 2009 / 10:25 pm

    @Rosie – nice approach!
    @Iota – I like it, that’s so cunning! Technically honest.
    @Vic – it is funny, I’m enjoying the phase.
    @Plan B – Ah, tricky, isn’t it? I remember well that whole, “Well, I’m glad you told me, but…”

  6. Liz (LivingwithKids)
    5th December 2009 / 8:05 am

    Those cheeky monkeys do a lot in our house, too. At least the lies are all harmless – unlike some of the porkies I’ve been told recently!

  7. 5th December 2009 / 8:15 am

    I loved the time my son told me the teacher had taken them to England on the tram that day.

  8. 30th December 2009 / 5:21 pm

    Late to the party here, but I remember going to my son’s school open day and seeing a picture of a beach that he’d painted with the title ‘our holiday in Portugal’ underneath it.
    We hadn’t got further than our back garden, but I didn’t have the heart to tell the teacher 🙂